Blogging from office

tadaaaaaa...its tht time of the year again when I dont have any work and am in the mood to type out jestful mails(jestful from my perspective, mostly stupid mails as classified by the recipients)
today's topic is...come to think of it..such mails of mine dont have any topic generally and I think I will follow tht convention and keep this mail as confusing and generic as possibel, thus enabling freedom of thought for me...which truly refelcts my state of mind..confused, bored and with no specific thought..:-)))
To begin with , lets talk about bout FW@NJ Syndrome....more commonly known as the FirstWeek@a New Job....the victim of such a syndrome will reflect one of the following characteristics...if not all of them...or a combination of some of them...nyways..u get the drift right...
1) Immaculately Dressed
2) Very Polite
3) Restless till he/she gets the official mail id
4) Very happy if internet access is enabled and without restrictions
5) Very sad if the above condiution is not satisfied
6) Embarassed to display his/her temporary access card
7) "Checking" out the office "crowd"
8) Increased heart beat when assigned first task
9) Increased flow of "feel good" hormones when new mails from old friends hit their brand new inbox
Please Note : Beware of long mails from such victims, they tend to be never ending and make no sense, infact u start questioning the mental stability of the author...
Lets also talk about another common malice ailing todays young office goers, the ALSA syndrome, Im sure all of us have been ex-victims or are constantly attacked by this common yet dangerous syndrome......
Oh Sorry forgot to inform my highly learned audience bout the full form of the abopve mentioned acronym - ALSA - AfterLunchSleepAttack
The root cause of this syndrome is a non-existant entity in all bachelor office goers lifes...Breakfast...labelled by many as the most important meal of the day...
as soon as the clock strikes 12 noon, those enzymes hit our stomach wall and the fingers punching on the keyboard suddenly loose their strength and the pantry beckons out to you...
But those who are strong willed and ofcourse blessed with the gift of a heavy breakfast ignore this call....for weaker mortals like me..this call is too strong to ignore..
but wht follows afterwards should be seen to be believed....
Post lunch the two eyelids metamorphose from flesh to metal....the brain ceases to be a netwrok of neurons but becomes a blood eating peice of meat....
ur limbs suddenly feel the existance of gravity and that mattress lying in the one corner of ur room seems ur utopia.and..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.zzzzzzzzzzzzzz....